Leading in the Moment

This is from my colleague whom I often refer to as the Jackal. He is a hunter. Not a zoo animal.

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Leading in the Moment

I have a friend; let’s call him Joe, who is a great Leader in his personal life at work and work.  Joe gives to charities, volunteers and at work, does the right thing, works tirelessly and leads by example.  He inspired me in his giving.  Joe is not afraid to get his hands dirty and no job is too big or too small.   Hopefully you know someone like Joe.   We all have areas where we can learn from our past and Joe is no exception.  Joe was at his last company a long time.  Enough time that the good and bad experiences built up like layers of paint in this old house; the neural paths in his brain were well-formed and used.

Lead without prejudice.

Joe recently left his Executive level job to go to a smaller company.  For him, although not easy, it was time for a change.  Here is my wish for him.   In his next role I wish that he does what he is good at and that is lead.  This time lead without prejudice.    Sounds easier than it is to do in practice, since humans love to migrate between the past and the future, but often without regard to the present.   It is like taking an airplane to vacation.  You like where you live and where you are going but not the flight.  Daily I work at being in the present.  It is not easy.   So many people are in the past or in the future but never present, that is, they are never where they are.    I have a friend that is in the business as a film maker.   He told me that sometime he is so intent on the shot and so focused that it feels sometimes he is not “at” the location.   He told me “that if I did not watch the footage I would not remember where I was at the time of the shoot” This may work for an artist but not for a leader.   A leader needs to be in the moment or “on location” for the shoot.  A leader needs to lead in the moment and let his people be in the moment too.

• Be impartial
• Don’t prejudge
• Set clear expectations
• Have a deadline
• Verify commitment
• Allow for feedback
• Make adjustments
• Give feedback
• Hold people accountable
• Converse openly, often

How do you achieve this?

So many leaders and organizations cannot achieve it.

Why is perhaps it is not linear or circular or fit easily on a chart in a PowerPoint, rather it is a ‘way’, ‘path’, or ‘route’.  For me it is a part of the Tao.  Tao has ineffable qualities so it cannot be defined or expressed in words. It can, however, be known or experienced, and its principles can be followed or practiced.  Following this way allows a leader to be impartial and dispassionate.  It also allows the people you are leading to be and give them a Raison d’être, a reason to exist or to be and will avoid you being entrenched in a Coup d’état.  I am not saying ignore or not consider the past or the future.  Always take in feedback; don’t weaponize it into weapons of mass destruction as they might not really exist.    A hockey player has a stick but it is better used to score goals than draw blood.   If a person has a pattern or real history then it will be repeated.  As a leader your job is to get things done with the resources you have available.   Joe did a good job of this overall but was often stuck in the past performance and predicting future performance.   As the Financial Services clause says:  Past performance is no guarantee of future results, good or bad…   When someone comes to me and they are in the past I tell them to join the present, the now; be with me in the moment.   When they are in the future I tell them to pick a couple of good stocks for me and I will happily share the proceeds.   Joe got this and now when he is in the future he will stop himself and say “I know, pick you a winner”.  Good for him.

There is only the now.

What can a leader do? If a person has a bad track record in your opinion or based on feedback then hold them accountable.   Get an agreed upon commitment and hold them accountable.  If they achieve it, thank them.  If they don’t tell them directly, dispassionately without drama.  Experience the now and follow the path.

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Persian Girl

Meanwhile back in “my” world. Today I went with friends to breakfast. We usually go to the same place on a weekly basis. If we are lucky we gt the Persian Girl wait on us. She is extraordinarily beautiful in a very exotic, middle eastern way.  She is also very pregnant. We always kid with her and I, more than my one friend. She was unhappy about how “fat” she was getting. She is by her own omission a big boned girl and she had gained close to 30 pounds. I told her I was big boned too. That’s the way some of us peasant types are built. “I’m fat too,” I said jokingly.

“No,” she protested. “You are in great shape.” And I am for a guy my age.  I am not tall. At my very best I might have been 5’7″ and I usually weigh around 140 pounds. It helps that I run every other day for an hour or so.

But that isn’t the story. I looked at this girl and catching her gaze I told her that she looked wonderful and that once she had the baby she would be thin again.She would never be truly thin. Even before her pregnancy she wad been full figured in that lush way that drives some men crazy.

She started to smile, blush and run her hands through her hair. Yeah, yeah. I know nothing is going to happen. Nothing needs to happen. If I were a big fat slob maybe she wouldn’t haven’t even stood there intently listening to me with those dark, assessing, oriental eyes.

“Look,” I said. “We’re both in the big boned club.” She blushed again. I could see that she loved it.

We paid the bill and as I got up to leave, I asked her what she had weighed before (the pregnancy).

“130 pounds. I am about 5’3″,” she added.

That’s not thin but on her it looked very good.

“You’ll be there again,” I said as I walked to the door.

She looks like the figure to the far left but thinks she looks like the figure to the far right.

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Post from the Jackal

From my friend, the Jackal

This is how he has survived and kept working in Silicon Valley:

In the mid 90’s I came to the California to work in Technology in Silicon Valley.   I don’t regret it but I have experienced a lot of ups and downs, some self imposed.  In my time here I have been fired, laid off, acquired, merged, reduced and left on my own.  People talk about job security and such but I am not sure it exists.  Along the way I have learned that the only real job security is knowing you can get another job.   Knowing this has freed me.  I have two universal principals.   1-Network every day. 2- Help as many people along the way.   People have referred to me as a Networking Guru and other similar compliments.  Last week a friend called me a Networking God, but I told him I was not and definitely not with a capital “G”.   To me it is just a way of life, just what I do.   If I am any good at networking, it is because I have had a lot of practice.  Last night I heard a ball player interviewed.  He had just hit the winning home run in the playoffs.   They asked him about his game.   I was impressed by how humble his response “ When I was eight I told my mom that I wanted to be a professional ball player”.  “I wanted to be a pitcher, but I didn’t throw hard enough.   Although we did not have a lot of money, she bought me a batting cage.   I can’t tell you how much time I spent practicing but I did every day”.   There is an old joke that goes “how do you get to Carnegie Hall”? Practice, Practice Practice.

No job is safe from the Jackal

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Away

Wanting time away from work didn’t quite work out.  I didn’t get far enough away. Figuratively I should have flown to Venice, parked myself there for a year and stopped all work related transmissions, discussions and thoughts. Instead I allowed myself to get drawn into work-like stuff.

Yes, stuff.

First coaching kids at a local high school became pressured and work-like with schedules and have-to’s and frankly stress. Then I was drawn back onto an advisory board which evolved into weekly meetings, responsibilities and expectations. This last one ain’t too bad because I went back in, drew the line and said what I was willing to do and what I was not willing to do. But it started to look like a job and that bothered me.

The coaching is ending today. The advisory board continues for now. But I have another chance to make my life non work-like starting November 3rd.

There will be work. I will write my novel and my blog(s). I will help folks now and then but no more Mister Big Work Rules.

They come creeping back if you let them.

Most of my close colleagues aren’t that happy with their jobs. Not all of them. But many of them. I listen to their prattle as they listened to mine (for year upon year). But I was rarely happy in my work. Sun was the exception because I had so much freedom. Consulting wasn’t half bad when I didn’t let it become a job with ugly commutes and have to be there meetings and all the other trappings. So here I go again. One more attempt at being free.

My sister-in-law asked me how retirement (not working) is working out. I told her I don’t honesty know. I haven’t tried it yet. I haven’t truly discovered the freedom and magic of it all. I can remember it back in the 1970′s when I took break time but I always had go go back. Now I don’t.  In my own way I have created my unique game reserve and even though I know how to hunt in that place, it does not free me to not hunt.

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Coming soon

TERMINATION.PLANET.COM

Return of the Nasties

An idea whose time has come!

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